chambers again

mm. words. the power to release, or to encage.

tonight we'll go with the latter. all the thoughts and feelings within this heart are going to stay there. locked deep in the little tattered box. where the inexpressible flutters like a bird without wings. not suppressed or restrained--thank God he finally got that foolishness out of me! but in a place where He can bring them out and we can deal with em, but not now.

the need to release wordage of some sort will burn if i don't write something. burning always has a flame, flame creates light, and i do not sleep well with any sort of light...

so. i'll write from my head & share truth:

this major encouraged/challenged me last month. re-read it today. because i have grown weary of asking...i do limit God! i do view the kind of heart i want so much as impossible for somebody of my personality--as if My Creator were limited. He created me with flaws that His grace might abound. that His power might be shown...anyway. the process IS God's purpose. HE works within me as i pray, as i seek, as i ask. He DOES want to answer with yes and amen! He wants, and will, grant me sight. but in His timing...because if I will be faithful to press in. He will be faithful to work in me something I do not know to ask for. His plans are bigger than i can see. oh, and even in that is not my effort or lack thereof that the grace hinges on--HE does all. despite of me more often than not. haaaallelujah! to have nothing of the old life left...

What do you Want the Lord to Do for you?

By Oswald Chambers

Lord, that I may receive my sight. (Luke 18:41 KJV)

What is the thing that not only disturbs you but makes you a disturbance? It is always some thing you cannot deal with yourself. "They rebuked him that he should hold his peace . . . but he cried so much the more." Persist in the disturbance until you get face to face with the Lord Himself; do not deify common sense. When Jesus asks us what we want Him to do for us in regard to the incredible thing with which we are faced, remember that He does not work in common-sense ways, but in supernatural ways.

Watch how we limit the Lord by remembering what we have allowed Him to do for us in the past: I always failed there, and I always shall; consequently we do not ask for what we want. "It is ridiculous to ask God to do this." If it is an impossibility, it is the thing we have to ask. If it is not an impossible thing, it is not a real disturbance. God will do the absolutely impossible.

This man received his sight. The most impossible thing to you is that you should be so identified with the Lord that there is nothing of the old life left. He will do it if you ask Him. But you have to come to the place where you believe Him to be Almighty. Faith is not in what Jesus says but in Himself; if we only look at what He says we shall never believe. When once we see Jesus, He does the impossible thing as naturally as breathing. Our agony comes through the wilful stupidity of our own heart. We won't believe, we won't cut the shore line, we prefer to worry on."