10.28.2008

(encircled)

i need to hear this:

you came down
a light into the darkness
to souls that once were hopeless you gave joy
at calvary, you gave your life to save us
the righteous for unrighteous
so we could know your grace

you are good
and your mercy lasts forever
you are good to me
you are good
and your grace could not be measured

i am yours
forever you are with me
encircling, defending my soul
and when i fall
you draw me through your mercy
you faithfully forgive me
you lift me up again

When I think of my grandfather, it's tempting to ask "where's goodness?" Even as I pray for God to act, I wonder will He choose too. As if that is my business. It looks like Grandpa Benjamin is forgotten. But NO. He is encircled. Surrounded by God's constant care. Nothing can touch him apart from God's will. He is secure.
I need to remember. I need to believe. My heart is deceitful. I fool myself into thinking I am trusting God when in reality I'm working on "dams practical plans A, B and C for saving her family, friends and the world in general." What arrogance! I can't even save me from myself, but hey, I am going to save you. Job 38-42 is incredibly helpful. To paraphrase God's words to my own soul: Did I create the heavens? Do I know what lies in the depths of the oceans? Am I good [on my own]? Am I infinite?
No, no, no, no.
Therefore, how can I expect to understand the plans of God? He IS infinite and good. He created the heavens, earth, humans, life itself. I cannot expect to grasp the will of One whom I cannot even understand fully. That is how Job helps. It humbles me. It shows my pride and sinful motives. It reminds me I'm growing in trust. Still learning how to fully surrender every day. But it also gives hope as it displays God's greatness, majesty, brilliancy, glory.
What do I do with changed perspectives? Rest. In the fact that I, and all those who trust in Him, are always encircled by goodness. Practically applying it all...still figuring that out.

6 comments:

DearVoid said...

ahh i love it damaris so true. i need to hear that over and over : )"not my will but Thine be done"

Mac said...

He will make clear when he want's too. You have nothing to do but wait. I have nothing to do but wait until I can be able to clearly breathe again for life. God can choose to fully heal me whenever. If He does. I can't know for sure. All I can do is take medicine that doesn't work. Oh, wait, that's nonsense. If I take something that doesn't work, Why take it at all?

josiah said...

Love the photo.

God has been faithful he will be again...

that's a good song.

Mac said...

Aye, it is...I HATE BEING SICK!

Marvin033 said...

Where was that photo taken..it looks familiar...

Kayla

a voice in the desert... said...

yes and amen! I will keep you and your grandfather in my prayers. I love you!