wild melody

i was pretty depressed this morning. discouraged about the direction of politics, of life, of the american and world current atmosphere. what is God up too? im wondering if i'm going to see strange things in my lifetime or if its just part of the cycle of ups n downs that have continued throughout all of history. but. God is the one who holds the nations in His hands, He sets authorities in power. He has a long-term, worldwide plan of redemption that will display HiS glory and culminate in the return of the Warrior-King Christ. He is always working towards that goal. He is my hope. My peace, my assurance. so. because of all the ^above^ i am *determined* to enjoy today. its not shallow, its okay to wrestle with God in the morning & then choose to delight in little everyday things. or maybe it is, i don't care. life. is. still. beautiful... *hooray for front porches on second-story apartments--treetops rising above the buildings in front of me are right at eye level; alo...

I found this on a friend's blog: "Autumn is my absolute favorite season. The eye-feast of warm colors contrasting the crispness in the air; the elusive dry smell of dying greenery and burning leaves; the associations of harvest and homecoming. Which is, naturally, why I live in a state that is utterly bereft of all of these things. God doesn't want to overload me with more ecstasy than I can handle, apparently." So true. I can't think of a single thing I dislike about fall. The air is a little more crisp (if 90s can be crisp) and the sky is a deeper blue. This is enough to keep me from bemoaning the unchangingness of sub-tropic climate.

I am ready for cooler weather. wind. changing leaves, falling leaves. open windows. sweaters. brighter stars. baking. Fall is my favorite season. Living in non-season florida, I'm tempted to whine and wish I could go to Virginia every september/october. This year, I'm trying to practice gratefulness. So I'm finding subtle signs that summer is breaking: the sky is a deeper blue, the air is nearly crisp, it smells like fall... The past two days, I've driven home with my windows down and the wind wasn't hot or sticky. It is glorious. (( why is it that fall + older coldplay is swell? coldplay goes well with lots of things. but when i am driving around in the fall i find myself listening to thier old stuff. it just fits perfect.)) I am grateful that God created seasons.

Last week I swung through Starbuck s en route to the doctor . I can't say much for the state of my heart...I certainly wasn't viewing doctors as a means of grace. The barista must have seen "sin of ungratefulness" emanating from me. I think she said "would you like some conviction with that?" Anyway, later as I sat in the room of perpetual anticipation I read the following: " The Way I See It #196 The greatest leader is a servant. Don't be a boss. Be a real leader, a servant leader. A servant leader is a winner . Even when he loses everything, even when he loses his life , a servant leader wins it all. --Pat Williams " Even though it doesn't say "Christ died for sinners" it immediately brought the gospel to mind. I was convicted in my non-rejoicing attitude . Doctors are a gift. An undeserved one. How kind of Him to interrupt my little grumbling fest, and in such a lighthearted way. I laughed. God is so kind. Who says He doe...

some random things I'm thankful for: Jesus the gospel getting off work early God's word music my fam cold weather the beks (+ my whole 2nd fam) yummy food cousins als canadians coffee good books sharpies seasons emma (job #1) michaela, alyssa, chloe, olivia (job #2) the lindseys driving down to hang with us dell and corning and last but not least...for God's sovereignty... and for new chemo treatments being effective. seriously, we have so much to thank God for. sometimes i think we forget how incredibly blessed we are. because we don't live in places like cuba or the streets of orlando; we look at all the things we can't or don't have. Rather than the wealth of blessings God has poured out on us. The fact that we can walk into a store like Publix and even have choices is mind-blowing to our brothers and sisters in some countries. i should live in a constant state of gratefulness--surely God's work on the cross is more than enough reason! have a good {am...